Episode 37: "Mockingbird"
As mentioned, this episode is more of a bridge episode, where you know the really good shit will happen. Unfortunately, it kind of muddies the waters on some plot points.
Scarface and Arya come across a man who seemingly is the victim of an attack, and badly wounded. Scarface mercy-kills the man, but all of a sudden, he's ambushed by more attackers, one of whom is able to wound his neck. One of the men is one of the men Arya saved a couple of season ago. She kills him. Later, Scarface begins to voice that no Stark is worth this much of a reward as he tred. Arya notes that his wound will become infected if not cauterized, then takes a burning piece of wood...
...I have to stop here, because I know that this is yet another attempt to sow Scarface's fear od diew, but the instances of fire that we have seen, just like this scene, could have scared any person who didn't have pyrophobic tendencies. I mean, I wouldn't want an open flame next to my hair or my neck...
...but anyway, he refuses and tries to stitch his neck back together on his own, then tells her of his past and how his brother burned his face in a fire as a child simply for borrowing one of his toys. She decides to help sew his stiches.
Elsewhere, across the sea in Mereen in Daenerys' new empire, she is greeted in her chambers again by Dario. Dario feels his talents are wasted in this city and begs Daenerys to either let him lead an army against the rebellion or let him sleep with her. Because Daenerys is thirsty, she decides to do both.
The next morning, Mormont sees Dario leave Daenerys' chambers and is salty, but measured, more disappointed than jealous. During this conversation, it's revealed that appearently Mormont killed his own brother? DId I hear that right? He again tells her she needs to balance justice with mercy, so she says she will send the Second Sons army to Yunkai with the guy who petitioned her from the previous episode to give the slave masters a choice. She also tells Mormont to tell Dario that he changed her mind; basically telling Mormont that he's her trusted friend.
Elswehere Madame Red and Madame Stannis interact in a scene where Madame Red is naked in a bath, and I can't tell is Madame Stannis if suppressing her distaste for Madam Red and Stannis' sexual union and covering it up with religion, or if she's lusting after Madame Red and covering it up with religion. Either way, she says that that litle girl, Shereen, HAS to go with them for the next part of the plot. Forced party members suck.
Up north in the wall, Jon Snow tries to convince the Crowmanders to seal the wall, and they say no. There was no reason to even have this scene in this episode. Move it to the next one.
There is some news on the Podric and Sergean Calhount front. They stop at a tavern which is conventiently staffed by Porky, the break-baking boy who had escaped from Superjail with Arya and MiniTaur. Sergeant Calhoun asks if he have seen Sansa Stark, but he says Sansa Stark is a traitor. Podric later questions Sergeant Calhoun's decision to ask about Sansa, only for Porky to come back with a well-made wolf-shaped loaf and reveal that he knows Arya's Stark is alive and recaps Seasons 2 and Season 3. They reason that Arya must have gone to MilkMaid Mountaintop.
Back in the capital Tyrion has a problem. He can't get anyone to fight for his behalf. His BSS got paid off and is now dressed in finery, Incest Charming can't fight. Worse yet is the state's champion, or rather, the People's champion is the Mountain, that horse-slaying giant of a man from the first season that everyone kept talking about. He's literally slaughtering people as practice, and Incest Queen meets with him.
Then Oberon visits Tryron's and recounts the day he saw Tyrion as a baby. He says that he also says that he noted that despite what his family described, that Tyrion wasn't a monster. He says that to get revenge, he'll be the champion for Tyrion.
In other words, he'll either die valiantly or fake-fight and lose, because the Mountain is a character whose name I have heard of, but Oberon is not a Game of Thrones character I know. Bye, bye, bye. dude
But at Milkmaid Mountaintop, it's snowing and Sansa builds a snow replica of Winterfell. Robin turns into a little Joffrey and starts destroying it. Sansa slaps him and Robin runs away. Don't Trust Me, Bro approaches, and consoles Sansa. Sansa asks why Don't Trust Mem Bro really killed Joffrey, especially since Don't Trust Me, Bro was instrumental to her father's death. She's growing a brain! Don't Trust Me, Bro confesses that he always loved her mother, sees some of that mother in Sansa, then kisses her, and the Milk Maid sees this, so later she summons Sansa next to the sky window and nearly throws her out . Don't Trust Me, Bro talks her out of it...then pushes the MilkMaid down the sky gate.
I know this is supposed to be a super-callous moment, and I was somewhat spoiled by this developent due to CBS showing this particular scene in preparation for the final season (thankfully after I saw the first MilkMaid s), but I can't help but cheer. Seriously, the MilkMaid wasn't just odd or unusual, but she was violent and dangerously unhinged. If Sansa would not have been made to be falling from that great height, it would have been Don't Trust Me, Bro. Still, could Don't Trust Me, Bro show signs of being an antihero?
Besides, MilkMaid looks too much like Stannis' wife who is also crazy, just like BSS looked too much like that guy who was supposed to be transporting those kids to the wall. Killing them off the duplicates means I can keep people straight.
- Daenerys is the mother of Dragons, but I hope she and her army kidnap and raise Shereen. Hey, the girl has dragon scales, They need to adopt that poor girl and get her away from her fanatic of a mother and Madame Red. Stannis can have visitation rights, but only if CrabMan is present so that he can learn how to read.
- I just realized that Incest Charming probably took the King's Guard position so that Bad Dad would have a reason to keep Tyrion around as a spare. Here I thought it was just because he wanted to make love to his sister. No, his saving grace is that he deeply, yet platonically loves his brother.
- Tyrion actually thought Melania came back to spite him? I think that confinement has dulled his sharp wits. As he said, though, a mind needs books like a sword needs a whetstone and he hasn't done much reading as of late.