Episode 62: "Stormborn"
Daenerys is at Dragonstone and she has her Legion of Doom -- or her Superfriends, depending on how you look at it -- with her at the war room where Stannis used to plot his strategy. She first grills Uncle Fester, getting to admit that he did try to poison her a long, long time ago. They both come to an understanding that she will never have his steadfast loyalty, but if he plots against her again, she will kill him.
Then next thing you know, there's a visitor. It's Madame Red.
Since Madame Red is a priestess of Daenerys' favorite religious practice of immolation, she gets to relay a prophecy of a Chosen Prince. Basically, this scene is an excuse to get Daenerys to meet Jon Snow, and Tyrion vouches for his brother-in-law so she then sends word to Jon Snow to bend the knee to her.
There's also Daenerys' grand plan. Because everyone knows Incest Queen is going to appeal to the xenophobia of the populace, the Unsullied and the Dothraki are going to storm Casterly Rock. Meanwhile, the Viper Sisters and the Iron Islands crew are sailing...to the capital? I didn't quite get that part. But anyway, Operation Stormborn is on the way!
Afterwards, Granny Goodwench gives Daenerys advice. Don't listen to "clever" men like Tyrion but listen to herself.
After this, we have a tender scene with Grey Worm, who is being sent to Casterly Rock, and Missandei annoyed at his apparent coldness. Grey Worm confesses to Missandei that she is his weakness, that while some boys were afraid of heights, or dogs, or fire, he was afraid of nothing. She's miffed by this, but then he confesses some more, this time mostly with his body and the two kiss. She disrobes, and Grey Worm demonstrates that the thirst is real. It's actually a good scene, showing these two guarded and distinguished figures in a vulnerable light, a proper use of sex in terms of a dynamic. If the sex scenes earlier in Game of Thrones had been done this well done instead of thrown in for titillation sake (boat sex, war room sex, hot-spring-in-the-dead-of-winter sex), then maybe this show wouldn't have had such a bad reputation.
So then Jon Snow meets with all the houses of the north again in Winterfell. He mentions all the letters he receive and says he's going to meet with Daenerys, because she has dragonglass and dragons, and since dragons breathe fire, they can kill the undead. I'm not being facetious; he explicitly says this like he has to spell it out for them that two plus two is four. This time everyone, not just his sister, is against this, but because Jon Snow must be right, he doesn't listen and says he's going to Dragonstone. He decides to leave Sansa in charge
And Don't Trust Me, Bro watches. He also goes down to the Stark crypt and has the audacity to both call Jon Snow out for not thanking him for his help, but also tells Jon Snow about his love for Mama Stark and Sansa Stark, saying . Jon Snow has to choke a "Littlefinger" to get the message across to not screw with his sister.
In the Riverlands, Arya meets up with her old friend, Porky, at the tavern where she last saw him. Porky said that he told two people looking for her sister about her. He also informs her that Jon Snow has taken over. She then leaves the tavern, although whether or not she's going north or not is confusing, since it's starting to snow everywhere. In the middle of the woods, as she camps, Arya is surrounded by a wolfpack, and one giant direwolf. Apparently this is the direwolf that was left behind, and she now is leading her group. She faces off against Arya, but then leaves. The message is clear. You can't go back to the past.
Meanwhile, Incest Queen is, as predicted, appealing to the houses to stand by her side against the foreign invasion. One of those lords is Sam's father. Incest Charming tried to get him to come to a handshake agreement. Sam's dad will think about it.
But a large portion of this episode is devoted to Sam. The show stops the song and dance and shows Jorah Mormont being treated for the Dragon Pox. Apparently, Mormont took Daenerys' order for him to find a cure at face value. The doctor tells him that it's too late to cure, that Mormont should have just cut off his arm once the scales started to appear. The doctor also tells him he has about six months before he loses his mind, and that he can use the rest of the day to decide if he wants to avoid that fate by falling on his sword.
Sam, though, is determined to save Mormont, especially after learning his name. He knew that Shireen had been cured of the dragon pox somehow. He turns into House M.D. and comes up with an experimental treatment, where he pulls off the scales and rubs a special ointment on the exposed skin.
....it's not going to be this easy, is it?
Finally, we close with a sea battle.
The Viper Sisters and Sister Wife are sailing in a fleet. Sister Wife and Stephanie MchMahon make googly eyes at each other and start to do a little more than meet eyes. All of a sudden fireballs rain from the sky and their fleet is met with another fleet.
It's Uncle Captain! He leaps on the boat like he's Sabretooth from the X-Men movies looking for Wolverine. It's a wild battle at sea, in which the Viper Sisters are killed and Sister Wife is taken prisoner. Uncle Captain does the same to Stephanie by holding her hostage, and Waterboy stares him down...
....and turns back into Reek and dives back into the sea, hanging onto a piece of floating debris. Yep, he reeked out.
- Why didn't Tyrion mention the obvious tie to Winterfell, that he's still legally Sansa's husband?
- Why didn't Jon, instead of meeting with Daenerys, make Sansa go?
- Will we ever see rowboat boy MiniTaur ever again?
- Why did Don't Trust Me Bro act like Mama Stark hated Jon Snow? The only animosity she ever showed on screen was when she relating how as a baby she hated Jon Snow and quickly got over it when she realized how selfish she was for doing so. She never acted poorly to him! He's the one who wanted to go to the wall because he didn't think that there was much future in staying in Winterfell (he had FIVE brothers and sisters at the time) and he thought it was the honorable thing to do. This show is trying to push Jon Snow as the red-headed stepchild, but it's not lining up with that we've seen.
- Sansa's acting weird because she's pregnant with Ramsay Bolton's baby. There's no way he assaulted her that many times without her having a bun in the oven.