Episode 67: "The Dragon and the Wolf"
The representatives of Winterfell, the Brothers Without Borders, Daenerys and such form a Sense of Right Alliance and arrive in King's Landing. Everyone meets in this new set, the Dragon pits. There are a lot of reunions, like BSS with Tyrion, Podric with Tyrion, the Mountain and Scarface, etc. Daenerys comes in flying with her remaining two dragons and they talk with Incest Queen.
After a short preamble, the heroes bring out the undead warrior, who after Scarface turns the box over, lunges at the spectators. It's so unnerving that it makes Daenerys, who has seen the undead firsthand, flinch. The warrior is cut down, but still fights. Kieben actually looks at the severed hand, which still moves. Jon Snow then demonstrates the undead could be killed with dragonglass or fire.
Incest Queen then agrees to a truce, if and only if Jon were to vow to remain neutral. Jon Snow says no, he is already pledged to Daenerys, and everyone, even Daenerys facepalms as his inability to lie. Incest Queen leaves and everyone tells Jon that he needs to learn to lie to save the kingdom.
So Tyrion decides to work his magic. The two yell at each other, and talk, then she cradles her stomach. Tyrion realizes that she's pregnant. He doesn't seem to make dent in her resolve, so he leaves the scene. Later she announces that not only has she changed her mind, but that her armies would be marching north with the heroes.
But Incest Queen has a super-secret plan, pulled right from Emperor Gestahl's playbook. Her plan was to get Tyrion to think he convinced her to change her mind. That way she could lie and pledge support, but leave the Sense of Right Alliance weakened or killed from fighting the Rabid Skeleton Army. She says she really sent Uncle Captain to retrieve the Gold Army that she bought from the Iron Bank. Incest Charming claims that this beyond the pale even for her. After all, if the undead win, they die. It's also needlessly complicated because she could have easily killed the lot of them when they were in front of her. Incest Charming finally comes to terms that this woman, even though she's his sister and lover, is just too far gone to reason with, and he decides to leave. But, no, she threatens him with a beheading from the Mountain. She says she won't let anyone walk away from her. He calls her bluff. She lets him leave and he decides to ride north as the snow falls on King's Landing.
Good. Now STAY AWAY! She makes you a worse person the longer you are around her.
In other plots, Waterboy starts to man up and tells the remnant of Iron Islands fighters that they need to rescue Stephanie McMahon. The acting leader says no, so he and Waterboy fight. Waterboy wins.
Also, Sansa talks more with Don't Trust Me, Bro about Arya's intentions. She then summons Arya, and is sitting beside Bran. Once all three are there, Don't Trust Me, Bro is put in the spotlight for his treachery. He begs for his life, but they had already decided to execute him, so Arya slits his throat.
He's dead. Thank you!
But we have two more bombshells. Sam arrives in Winterfell, so Bran and Sam talk. Bran says that he needs to tell Jon that he's Liana's son. Sam adds that in he learned in the diary of a priest that Rhaegar actually married Liana, who wasn't carried away and raped. She was in love with Rhaegar, and Jon is Rhaegar's legitimate son. That means through some convoluted show logic, he's the rightful king of the seven realms.
And he's having sex with his kin as he beds Daenerys, who keeps claiming she can't have kids because that seer told her that way back in season 1. (No, dear. Dario was likely shooting blanks.) Tyrion watches on for some reason. Is he concerned or is he contracting Stalker Syndrome, too?
Anyway, there are so many reasons why from a storytelling perspective this reveal does not make sense. While Jon Snow's parentage was always something hinted to be other than it was, it was pretty clear he was supposed to be Robert Baretheon's son, not Rhaegar Targaryen's son. There's no reason for Ned to change the King's will otherwise. Madam Red's magic only works with people who share the blood of the King, and we were shown that Stannis' blood could be magical, and he sure wasn't a Targaryen. Jon Snow has jet black hair, just like all of Robert's kids. Heck, the scene with him and MiniTaur doesn't have as much punch if he's a secret Targaryen vs. a secret Baretheon.
The Bartheons were the rightful heirs of the Iron Throne until they were all killed, and we all know MiniTaur isn't climbing on that throne, so for Jon to be a candidate by being a buck would make more sense.
Unfortunately, there are only 6 more episodes, and it's unlikely they'll pull an "Oops! Robert, you ARE the father" here. I see that the showrunners were trying to subvert expectations. ("You fools thought the father was Robert, but it is I, Rhaegar.") The problem is Jon has absolutely none of the Targaryen traits and has a lot of Baretheon ones (it didn't take him *that* long to start breaking his celibacy vows with Merida), and the ones he doesn't have is because he was raised as a Stark. But there's no way someone like Daenerys or Viserys would have ever acted like Starks had they been raised in his care.
But the other bombshell is waaaaay more satisfying.
The undead are marching, and they reach the wall. Ol' Blue Eyes, on the back of his new zombie dragon, uses it to utterly smash the wall at Eastgate with its fire breath. There is no more wall to hold the Titans back. Everyone can march down south.
Winter is here, and it welcomes Westeros to die.
- There is no reason for Incest Queen to live. None. Even Bad Dad would have supported sending a straw or token contingent, then withdrawing support. The way she's doing it will just make everyone mad at her.
- I'm glad that the Starks are united. This explains why Bran was absent from these scenes.
- Funny, no one told Incest Charming that his Valyrian steel sword was needed. Thus he's going there on his own.
- I'm disappointed that Tyrion and Sansa have yet to reunite. I hope they do.