Nangbaby (nangbaby) wrote,


LiveJournal asks the following question, "If you won $100 this afternoon, what would you do with it?"

I'd spend it on two things I want that are $50 bucks a piece (I'm not telling you what they are), and then ask where I could get some more.

I only answer that because I'm not going to be even online -- even on LJ for a while -- despite the recent change in status in my journal. No, I'm not going to intentionally kill myself or someone else, but still, I'm just tired of the same song and dance routine where everyone is concerned. From IM to e-mail, and even to boards, I slowly weaned myself away from them, since no one really paid attention to what I wrote and everyone just wanted to agree with each other and call each other friends based on that. I just can't take being the only one in whatever I do or say that I feel is important, while everyone has already created their inner circles that by definition exclude you, especially when those inner circles include known jerks who have called you the worst names in the books. Still, I'm not talking about specific LJ comments or a lack of thereof, but there's a camaraderie that all of you -- yes, each and every single one of you, friend or unknown reader, male or female, yadda, yadda, yadda -- develop and I'm incapable of developing. They all get together and act as a highly coordinated unit, while the next thing you know you're fading away into the night, your voice being muted as you scream.

Kieben, you're right. Life sucks.

So I'm going to say Happy Birthday to Arty in advance, even if he too has his own pals.

Don't worry, I always bounce back. Soon I'll be crying about something else.

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